Built for Love

Who would be interested in something that increases your impulse control and ability to sleep restfully while decreasing your perception of pain? And oh, by the way, it slows down the aging process too.

How much would you pay for an over-the-counter product that promised such benefits?  

I’m happy to tell you, this drug is free!  And all the side effects are good. It’s dopamine, and your body produces it all on its own. 

“Increase in impulse control” sounds very abstract and clinical, but let’s make it real. 

You know when you come home after a long day and somehow between dinner and bedtime, a box of Cheese-Its or a pint of Ben and Jerry’s has mysteriously disappeared from the kitchen?  And you have a bloated feeling of disgust?  That’s where impulse control comes in. 

All the times you have regretted eating something that you totally didn’t intend to eat, and you marvel at how your hands and mouth can be so completely disconnected to your mind and heart?  Impulse control. 

Wouldn’t a little shot of dopamine come in handy for those times?

Dr. Vincent Fortanesce is Clinical Professor of Neurology at USC, with several decades of experience in neurological disease, addictions, and most recently, Alzheimer’s prevention.  He appears regularly in the news as a spokesman for the medical profession on these issues. 

From his research, we know that diet and exercise do all these wondrous things for our body and mind, make us feel younger, more energetic and happier.   The trouble is, if you’re stuck in a cycle of overeating and underexercising, the prescription of “diet and exercise” taunts you like a shiny toy held just out of your reach.

So let’s get there by a different route: prayer.  Dr. Fortanesce has found in his research that when you pray, it stimulates the parts of the brain (infrafrontal and singulate gyrus, if you must know) that cause an increase in dopamine.  Prayer also causes a decrease in cortisol, the stress hormone. 

Prayer can decrease our pain perception and increase our ability to stay in control.  Don’t you want some of that?

You may think, “I can’t pray just because it helps me bypass the refrigerator!  That is insulting.” 

It’s not, really.  We are built in a particular way, and the fact that we function best when we pray is a built-in design characteristic, like a homing device.  It only makes sense that if we were made by Love, then we would function less well apart from that Love, and best when we are strongly connected.

It’s like sending your first child off to college.  You miss him terribly, while he is off discovering the great wide world.  He comes home for a visit after a month, but it’s mostly to see his hometown girlfriend and go to a football game.  But do you care?  No! You’re just overjoyed to see him!  It doesn’t matter why he came home; just that he did is enough.  That’s love for you.

It’s the same with prayer.  No matter why you undertake it, even if it’s only a quest for dopamine at first, it’s the seed of a stronger connection with Love.  Love doesn’t measure why we came; Love is just happy that we did. 

No News is Good News

Some of the biggest weight-loss breakthroughs I've witnessed were in people who came to realize that they had to LET GO.  Let go of the idea that they could get a different body without any major changes.  Let go of cultural norms.  Let go of childhood notions about the body.

I have interviewed and examined lots of people who've had great weight loss, trying to find out how that “switch” works, why some people get to a point where they are willing to let go and how others can get to that same point. 

It has something to do with surrender.  (And by the way, a negative reaction to the word “surrender” is  a good indication that you might want to consider it further.)

Over ten years of employment with WW, I have noticed that a good many of us have control issues; in fact, I would say that it’s our primary common denominator.  We’re angry that we can’t seem to control our weight; someone else has controlled us in the past so we’re desperately trying to control our present; being out of control frightens us; being in control defines us.

Nothing wrong with control, of course; we just seem to over-do it. 

The truth is, we’re not. We’re not in control of most things around us, and we’re not designed to be.  When we try to control what is not ours to control, we end up in a state of chronic stress. You know the clinical picture without being a doctor: you’re irritable, bloated, your joints hurt, you skip exercise, you catch colds easily, you can’t sleep through the night, your craving for sweets is constant, you overwork to distract yourself and then you eat to relax, you drink more wine than you’d intended and your sleep is disturbed even more. 

Inside your body, where you aren’t seeing it, your blood pressure is going steadily up, your adrenal glands are over-producing cortisol and adrenaline, insulin resistance is rising and your body is burning less fat.

Those are the effects of chronic stress.  We make ourselves crazy when we try to control stressors that we simply can’t.  Like the economy, our adult children, politics, and why England gets the new episodes of Downton Abbey four months before we do.

Let go.  Seriously.  Let it go, no matter how big it is.  If it’s not something directly under your control, the only sane thing to do is let it go.  If that requires turning off your computer or television, then pull the plug. 

Try going for a week without getting any news.  No news at all.  Like fasting from the news.  Don’t worry, I’ve done this before and it's not fatal.  I guarantee the world will go on even though you’re not hearing the latest.  Just try it for a week and see what you discover. 

How does “the news” have anything to do with weight loss and health??  You try it and let me know.  If you’re a genuine news-hound, you’re going to find this difficult to do. But how many of those things on the news do you have actual, hands-on control over?  Unless you’re a senator or congressman, the answer is probably “none.”

For most of human history, there was not this constant influx of news.  The Sistine Chapel was painted. Dante wrote the Divine Comedy.  The great Library at Alexandria was built.  Civilization managed to muddle on just fine without the nightly news.

Of course, the news is not the only source of stress in our lives.  You may even say it has nothing to do with your stress.   I nevertheless invite you to go on a week’s News Fast.  Just see what happens and post your comments here.  

More about this subject: Curb Your Addiction to News

The Body of a Champion

Did you follow the saga of Diana Nyad last weekend?  She is the 64-year old woman who swam from Cuba to Florida, without a (A) wetsuit; (B) shark cage; (C) sleep or (D) guarantee of success.  It took 53 hours of continuous swimming.  That means two nights of swimming out of sight of the shore with fathomless depths beneath her in the darkness of night.

She was nauseated a great deal of the time, which made fueling difficult, and endurance miserable.  Sheer determination kept her in the water.  It was her 5th attempt to make the distance.

Diana is part of an organization working to advance the lives of girls and women, through sports.  And what better way to build us up, than to show us that we affect our own destinies, that hard work and stubborn persistence will get us to our goal, even if it takes multiple attempts?

Check out this picture of Diana emerging from the water after her heroic swim:

That is the body of a champion.  Does it have flaws?  Is it perfect?  Does it fill you with envy?  

Now look at this body:

Which one would you pick if you had a genie to grant your fondest wish?  

We judge bodies based on how they LOOK, not on what they DO.  We can hardly help ourselves because the cultural message is so deep inside us.  

Look at your own body.  Some of us have been avoiding mirrors for decades now.  Why?  Because our bodies aren't the visual ideal.  But what does your body DO?  Do you walk, hike, hold grandchildren, dance, hug, stand firm, run amok, jump for joy?  Your body is a trooper!  

I am quite positive that Diana Nyad isn't looking at her press photos, saying to herself, "Oh my gosh, my legs look fat!" or "I just can't be seen in public in a swim suit."

She's also not saying, "I failed once before, so that's it.  I'll never succeed."  

For those of us with body issues and those who have tried to lose weight again and again, take to heart Diana's real words "Never, ever give up." 

More about Diana: http://www.nbcnews.com/health/diana-nyads-success-all-her-head-experts-say-8C11069093